Freeing Yourself from the chains of low self - esteem

August 8, 2018


This is a wonderful article  written by Marie - Claire Kuja


People would say, “You are so put together,” but didn’t know what a struggle my life was or how apart I was from myself. I wish there was a book on self-esteem in schools orlibrariesin myvillage when I was growing up. I had so many different struggles centered around negative belief systems I had formed based on what other people said about me.


Low-self-esteem is very cripplying.I was once in that place,a place of darkness but over the years and in the course of my journey I have learned so many valuable lessons that has shaped me and helped build my self -esteem and also made me the woman I am today. Hope you find at least one of them helpful.


I just stop by today to knock at the door of your hearts a little bit and to ask you;


What are you willing to do with your life that you have not done yet?


Are you willing to re-define yourself until you don't know who you are? Are you willing to enter places you have gone before?


Are you willing to say things you've never said?


Are you willing to surprise yourself?


Are you willing to scare the people around with all the gifts and talents God

blessed you with?


Are you willing to stop recounting all your past hurts, your trials and tribulations?


Are you willing to give birth to your dreams despite all the nay-Sayers around you, all the negative energy surrounding you?


Are you willing to love yourself like you have never done before?


Are you willing to be unapologetic about who you are?


Are you willing to stand in your greatness and stand on your story?


Are you willing to turn your scars into stars?


1) Magnify your potentials not your problems. I learned that before I was hurt someone was hurt before you, before you and I were verbally and physically abused before you, humiliated before you, wronged before you but they did survive. We can't go through life without problems; they come at some point in time. But what it means that we can magnify our potentials and not our problems. Some of us are experts at recounting our life stories, all the negative voices that comes up every time you are about to give birth to your dreams, for instance


* Weight

* Failed marriages

* Betrayals

* Family problems

* Rape Domestic violence

* Money Issues


Anyone with this habit stays in one place. see,, if there was any one person to sit and feel sorry for herself, or recount from one problem to another, that would have been me. But even as I sat underneath that tree on my way from school one day, I still vowed, No girl should go through this. I decided to let go and forge forward not only for myself but for others.


2) We can drop all negativity and all old stories said about us behind and find or create new stories for ourselves we can create our own paths, be our own kind of beauty. Be unique and authentic without apologizing.


3) There is something deep inside of you, a treasure, gold, pearl, diamond, silver. We all were created and given very unique gifts and talents. We all have treasures hidden {gifts and talents} within us but these are buried underneath people’s negative words and opinions about us. But it is our responsibility to dig deeper and deeper beyond false labels until we get into our gold mines. Only that way you will live a purpose driven life instead of just drifting or existing. If you don't do your assignment on earth then it wasn't done.


4) Words are very damaging, I experienced it firsthand. There’s a lot of false labeling in and around us. We are surrounded and live with and amongst people some of whom are experts at negativity and putting others down with bad words. No matter what you do there are people who will always put you down. Words can bless or curse, build or destroy. So what? Don't let people label you otherwise. Don't let any negative words take roots in your life. Know who you are and to whom you belong. Believe in yourself and your abilities because there is absolutely nothing as true and beautiful as what you know and believe about you. When the storm comes, you shall not be moved because you are standing on solid ground.


5) From time to time you will fall. That's for sure but if you are ready to listen to that still small voice---you will rise up and walk again .We may sometimes take wrong steps, its ok as long as we get up and correct our course. Even though some times on the journey of life, you're climbing the steps or running a race or trying to achieve a dream, then you get to a point where you feel like quitting, you feel as if you are out of breath, you become feeble and weak. And the negative voice tells you to quit .You don't have what it takes. But remember a hundred people may say no to you but sometimes it takes only one yes---- bang!! The break through. When you feel like you have nothing left. JUST remember to ask God, the provider of all strengths for just a little more to take you to the finish line. Never give up and don't you dare be a quitter.


6) Self talk. We all have negative self-talk in our heads sometimes. But there are enough people out there already telling us all the negative things so why do we want to tell ourselves that? I wrote in my journal a lot and used affirmative words. Letters to me and to God and read when I was down. Our thoughts influence action. We need to get our own self affirmative words and read back during quiet moments in the shower, bedroom to remind us about who we are instead of others telling us. Accept no one's definition of you but define yourself. Write the best letter about yourself and bring this out to whether you through the storms of life. Stop being too hard on yourself.


Remember that in life there are just some things no one can do for you. Even money cannot do them but you. Success is your birth rite as a child of God.


You are still God's Very Important Personality.Remember that you are the captain of your ship and the master of your faith. We set the stage for our lives. Remind yourself about all your good qualities. Magnify the good and never the bad.

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